Nella Fae Colyar McElroy Obituary (1920 - 2016)

Nella Fae Colyar McElroy Nella was born on May 8, 1920 in Altus, Oklahoma to Richard Nelson Colyar and Algea Fae Hughes Colyar. She was the youngest of three siblings. There was an older brother, Ardell Benton and an older sister, Maurice. When Nella was five years old, the family moved to New Orleans for three years so that her father could attend Baptist Bible Institute which later became the present New Orleans Baptist Theological Seminary. Nella attended Altus Junior College after high school graduation and graduated with a BA in English Literature from University of Oklahoma in 1940. She earned an MA in Psychology and Counseling from the University of Tulsa in 1967 and completed all courses for a PhD in 1984 from the University of Tulsa. She was a life-long member of Phi Beta Kappa Honor Society. She worked in private practice as a counselor and psychologist as well as with various organizations including Dillon Bright Sky, Tulsa Psychiatric Center, Tulsa Education Foundation School, and Rogers County Guidance Center. She is preceded in death by her husband, Bert, who died in 1983 and her son, Bert Colyar McElroy, who died in 1995. Her daughters are Martha Jane McElroy of Oak Ridge, Tennessee and Meredith McElroy of New Orleans, Louisiana. Her grandchildren are Stephanie Barrett, Sean Barrett McElroy, Jennifer McElroy, Jerry McElroy and Adrien Ysaye McElroy. There are six great-grand children: Leanne, Mary, Mark, Amaya, Kamali and Nova Nella and her husband, Bert, were very active members of First Baptist Church, Tulsa. Nella continued to serve in many areas of ministry in her church after Bert's death. She taught Bible study classes for fifty years, was an active member of Women's Missionary Union, the Stephen Ministry, and the Grief Ministry. She sang in the alto section of the Sanctuary Choir and the Saints Alive Choir. Nella kept busy all of her life with family and friends. Along with continuing studies toward her doctorate, she enjoyed many interesting hobbies such as Tai Chi and tennis, and loved walking on the beach near her Florida condo. Nella enjoyed traveling and socializing with a special group of women friends for many years. Nella served twenty-seven years on the Mainland Advisory Council for Hawaii Baptist Academy and served as President of the Council for one year. Since 1995 she has served on the Board of Trustees for Lakeside State Bank in Oologah, Oklahoma and on the Inverness Redbud Court Resident Council as Secretary. Later she became active in the Inverness Heather Hall Residential Center. Nella looked adversity right in the face and dealt with it upon the tragic accident Bert suffered that left him needing her full attention. She put aside her studies during that time and devoted herself to the care of Bert. This devotion spoke volumes to all who observed her commitment to her husband and to their marriage. Upon losing her son, Bert Colyar, a few years later, she again gave family and friends a picture of true faith and trust in the living God. She put herself and her grief in His hands and allowed Him to bring that peace and comfort that passes all human understanding. Nella was a great listener who made people feel comfortable in a counseling situation, understanding a family member, or as a friend who knew she could be trusted to hear what one had to share knowing she would hold it secure with thoughtful and good advice. She was an "interesting" person because she was an "interested" person. She believed in taking action when it was called for and her opinion was given appropriately at many levels. Her wisdom was to be treasured because one knew she had studied the situation, had weighed it prayerfully, and shared it willingly. In many ways, Nella was ageless in her professional life and her private life. She understood young people and appreciated their need to spread their wings, she was up-to-date on what was going on with young professionals and young marrieds and she had a wonderful way of comprehending the challenges and goals of the older generation. As she grew older, she made certain that her decisions about where she would live after moving from her family home were pleasing to her children. It gave them great comfort that she knew when to make these moves. Nella's generosity was certainly given in her time and efforts but also in monetary donations to incredible projects which appealed to her values. She quietly shared herself in touching the lives of so many and she will be remembered for her determination to fulfill her commitments in a manner of excellence.